"The BLUES ain't bout makin yo self feel better, its bout makin other people feel worse"

I LOVE music, and i absolutely love jazz and "The Blues", there is just something about it that speaks volumes to me. The title of this blog is a quote from the Simpsons, and it is delivered by one of my most fav characters (who unfortunately got killed off) Bleeding Gums Murphy!!! I remember when i first got my guitar, all i wanted to play was the blues, so i started to learn some of Eric Clapton's songs, although there was lightyears worth of distance between my skills and his (i'll let you decide who is better). Somehow through the years i've drifted in to the happy go lucky world of Jazz, which i also love but when i went to "Charlotte Street Blues" (which is the name of the blues bar that i shot these images at, thanx to a fantastic guitarist and drummer friends of mine who are none other than Couros Sheibani and Henry Dobson) the expressions on the musician's faces reminded me of how much i use to love the blues and just how emotional it can get when performing or playing.

From now on i am going to start playing more often, and hopefully start developing more skills and riffs. My problem is that i have the attention span of a squirrel and can never finish learning a scale or chord progression properly so i end up forgetting it a couple of days later, but now if i force myself to learn songs and play with more people regularly then i will have no choice but to get better!!!

All the performers at the bar were incredible both to watch and listen to and i was completely blown away by their skill and passion!!! I was put to shame by a boy who looks no older than 14 playing like a seasoned pro, and seeing that kid play in such an amazing way has inspired me to go back to the guitar & sax and play my ass of every day!!! I will definitely be going back to Charlotte Street to listen to some more amazing music being performed by london's best blues musicians and young talent.

A Fresh Start

Firstly apologies for not having posted this sooner and not being very responsive to people's messages, but in my defence i've been a bit busy and am at a very important point in my life. For the past couple of weeks i have been in training and working for a really great company that i hope i still feel the same about in the next couple of years as i can actually see myself having a future with my current job. When i was younger i absolutely loved the sense of security and routine, it made me efficient and confident but unfortunately it also made me arrogant and while the other kids my age were playing football, tag, jump rope etc... i spent my time reading, doing my multiplication tables and talking with my teachers to see how i can learn more and improve my knowledge of things... in other words i was a teachers Chihuahua!!! It was the same when i first came to england, i tried to keep to myself and also to my studies but little by little i started to change and as i started to go in to higher education, the sense of routine and stable life kind of started to scare me as i had started to improvise and take things as they come instead of mapping my life out before i have even done anything.

Now i have been given an amazing opportunity and i am so very happy to be at a point in my life where i am excited by whats going to happen but i can rest assure that as long as i work hard and keep pushing myself to do better, i can achieve the goals that i set for myself. I love performing and i love photography, but i think above all the thing i love the most is... connecting with people and to me that is the most valuable thing and i am so grateful that i get to be able to balance all of those three things in one job that pushes me to do better, that inspires me to help and inspire others.

Well my point is that life will throw you an obstacle course and you can try to plan what route you are going to take or you can just run through it blind, but if you take a moment look around you and tackle the course section by section and actually enjoy and find away to make the obstacles easier for yourself it no longer becomes an obstacle course but a fascinating maze to explore.

As for the pictures, they are from a recent production titled "She From The Sea" that a very good friend of mine designed. The production is a part of a bigger company which aims to give women who have had a rough journey and have been involved with the justice system a fresh start and a chance to explore a passion weather it is in performance or other aspects. I wish them all the best of luck with their careers and i hope to see more productions in the near future.

"You think you know, BUT you DONT!!!!"

Yesterday i had the fantastic pleasure of shooting a very good friend of mine, who is a very talented Actor/Singer/ Dancer/ Yogi and all round great person, known by the name of Mat Millns. Mat is currently performing at the Pentamiters Theatre in Hampstead in "You Never Can Tell". I know Mat from our days at the Gielgud (where i met many good friends whom i dearly miss as i don't get to see them as much as i use to) so when he asked me to do some quick head shots for him in the park before his show, it was a no brainer.

To say that Mat is full of life is an understatement as he has the ability to walk in to a room full of people he has never met and within minutes turn them in to an army of friends. Mat is someone whom i would ask advice from because he is a very honest person and wont tell me things i want to hear, to me that is a valuable friend as he tells me his exact view without any sugar coating.

Normally when i shoot actor's head shots i usually use a huge window to my back or have a speedlight in to a reflective or shoot through umbrella which has given me some fantastic results, but this time when i was shooting with mat we decided to use natural light in the park. Normally i jump strait to my speedlight as it is what i am use to and i know what results i can get from it, so in a way it is my safety net, but this time all i had to work with was the sunlight being diffused by the trees which to my surprise gave me MUCH BETTER results than any of my strobes did as there was this amazing quality to the light that i could never get with speedlights or strobes.

Some of the shots that i used a speedlight behind mat for were inspired by Zack Arias (who is an amazing photographer based in Atlanta Georgia). I know mat is a very earthly and i figured since we were in the park, lets try and get him to do some yoga and give the impression that he is drawing energy from the forest which is lighting up from the centre. I used a simple canon 430ex ii at full power (with a Stofen diffuser to spread the light) behind Mat with pocket wizards to trigger them. I exposed for mat and just lit the background with the speedlight, that way i get this cool effect where mat is a tad bit underexposed and the background is sort of glowing with light.

Ow and as for the title, its one of mat's lines from "You Never Can Tell" he has most of the best lines in the whole production, its only a pity it took 2 hours for his character to grace the stage, but WELL WORTH THE WAIT!!!

Just My Luck!!!!

Sometimes i just want to curl up in a ball and just rock back and forth because just when i think things are going well life throws a spanner in the works, let me explain.... For the past 3 months i have been doing everything i can to try and get a casting by meeting directors/ producers/ designers/ Casting directors etc... i have been waiting, hunting and begging (well not begging) for a casting and NOTHING, absolute ZILCH!!! All would have been well if i wasn't made redundant from my evening job by two very small minded, petty and IDIOTIC managers. Slowly but surely my finances started to dwindle as i desperately tried to get part time work but no luck. Just when i was about to admit defeat and go back to ushering there was a ray of hope, i was offered a really great job with a really great company and so i jumped at the chance. I figured i will work there for hopefully a year and then see weather i want to cary on a career in that company or if i am HEART AND SOUL an actor by returning to the uncertainty of employment!!!

Now that i am ready and looking forward to starting my new job, i get a call from my agent for 2 really great auditions WHICH I CANNOT MAKE!!!!! this was partially my fault as i had forgotten to update them with my availability, but the timing of it COULDN'T BE WORSE!!! if the first audition was a day EARLIER or the second audition a day LATER it would have been alright but 3 DAMN MONTHS of waiting, hunting and begging (well not begging) AND NOW 2 really great auditions come along and I CANT DO IT without jeopardising my new job (which i have been looking forward to starting for over a month now).

If all of that wasn't enough, i think i may have pissed my agent off with my availability, WHICH IS NEVER A GOOD THING!!!!! I have great respect for my agents because they have been very patient with me and they have been getting me seen for a lot of castings, which is seriously making me think... maybe the reasons i am not getting these castings is cause i am not very good as an actor.

Anywho enough about me ranting and raving, lets talk about these images. The pictures you see are from a production of King Lear at Central School of Speech & Drama, by first and second year students. This is the second time i photographed a production of King Lear and this one was an absolute pleasure to photograph as the director gave me freedom to roam wherever i wanted to and if i had missed something we can photograph it later by getting the actors to re do it. I was very impressed with the production (i have yet to read king lear but i will do so hopefully tonight) and the design aspects of it as well, i think all the people involved in the production have something to be proud of because there were times when i was drawn in by whats going on on stage and i almost forgot i had a job to do.

I hope one day i am back performing on stage again like these young talented performers so until then i wish them all the best with their careers and look forward to hearing about them or seeing them in other productions soon.

Svetlana, The Lancashire Lesbians & The Crack Smoking Rabbi

Yesterday i had the pleasure of photographing a group of very talented performers who will be taking their shows up to the biggest arts festival in the world that is the Edinburgh Fringe. The picture at the top is of a comedy sketch about the Lancashire Lesbian society which is performed by two very talented young actresses, who also are in the second image as the eastern European siamese twin sisters one of which is named Svetlana (i don't know why i felt the need to mention that but i guess i just really like the name ).

There were a couple of straight forward monologues and duologues which were performed very well but unfortunately not very memorable, thats not to say their performance was bad, its just there was a 3 minute extract from possibly a whole play, which when taken out of context, unless it is fantastically written, it can be easily forgotten. One of the other acts that stood out for me was a musician (who's name i don't have yet, will update it if he contacts me) who performed his own original song titled "Bad Bad Rabbi" about a rabbi who liked to indulge in the smoking of a certain white powder which is frowned up on by the Metropolitan Police.

It has been 2 years since i went to the Edinburgh Fringe Festival and i have been itching to go back up there as it was one of THE BEST MONTHS OF MY LIFE!!!! i was fresh out of university and doing what i loved almost every day for 30 days strait, and if things weren't great enough i was meeting so many interesting people and making friends like i've never known before. To me Edinburgh is a turning point because it forced me to find confidence in myself that i never knew existed as i had to grab the attention of hundreds of people who were passing by on a daily basis and when i did grab their attention i would have to keep it and before Edinburgh i would have cowered at the thought of just grabbing a stranger on the street and starting a conversation with them dressed as a white rabbit (don't get me started on the irony) and trying to convince them to come watch me and my colleagues perform the next morning. The show i was in was of-course Finding Alice, which i absolutely miss as i had a blast working on it with the cast and performing to the families. Till now one of my greatest memories is after we had just finished a show, we held a mad hatter's tea party for the families and one of the kids that saw the show ran up to me and said "Mr Rabbit, (correcting herself) MR, W Rabbit... could i have your autograph" and my immediate thought was, Why do you want my autograph i am WORTHLESS!!! but i didn't say that, i gave her my autograph and she ran to show her brother and mum, and i'll never forget that, Finding Alice was the show that showed me the Fringe Festival so for that i am forever thankful to all who were involved and those that came to watch it.

I now wish all the performers going up (including the cast of The Lesbian Bath House, who are also going up to the fringe) all the best of luck with their shows and i hope they really enjoy what edinburgh has to offer when the sun has set..... cause its ONE HELL OF A PARTY!!!!

Self Discovery?

I love theatre, there is just an amazing attraction i have towards it that i just can't explain, i love the fact it is never the same ever again. I am now at a point where i am really learning and discovering who i am, and i know at least that i want theatre to be a big part of my life in one way or another. I love the relationships and friendships you build with your fellow actors during the rehearsals and the run of the show, and you develop a small family with the people you are performing with, and that is something that i don't want to sacrifice because it has given me many fantastic friends whom i respect and really appreciate. Now i have been more of a photographer than an actor but to me that is still alright because it is another great passion of mine and i love that i get to take pictures of my other passion.

The Pictures you are seeing are from a production of "Richard The Third" at Central School of Speech & Drama, by the second year students most of which i recognised from a previous production i photographed which was fantastic... it was called "The Emperor of The Moon". It was a massive challenge to photograph these talented performers as there was quite a lot of seating in the way so i couldn't move around as much as i would have liked and the lowest i could push my ISO down was 1250 but that was for like 40% of the shots, the rest was either 1600 or the dreaded 3200. I would have never ever thought of shooting at ISO 3200 but with really great glass, full frame sensor & some careful nose reduction you can get a VERY USEABLE image but it must be processed very carefully.

Ow and SHOOT RAW!!!! it will save your ass later on in post processing, it will give you the best results out of your images, yea....yea....yea i know, i know.... its a pain to process as the files are huge but would you rather have the best possible results out of your images and a very happy client, or more time to play on Guitar Hero?

i'll leave you to answer that question....

R.E.S.P.E.C.T.

Ok the title will explain itself as you read on so let me start at the beginning.....

I once again had to grab my trusty Lowe Pro bag with all my gear in it and run to Central School of Speech & Drama, and this time i was helping out a friend of Suzi's who i now consider a friend of mine as well, ow and her name is Rachel. Rachel is a costume/set/ Graphic designer and an all round genius when it comes to the world of art and creativity. I of-course once again unaware of what it is that i have to shoot grab most of the gear i think i will need and turn up to see the challenge set for me and this time there was a good enough challenge. The challenge was the seriously low lighting (i am in no way criticising the lighting design as it really helped set the mood and tone of the production) as theatre photographers know this is an absolute pain that we have to work through. So far the human eye is the most advanced lens out there as it can see detail in extreme contrasts and make out shapes in almost pitch black scenarios, this is somewhat of a very TALL order for modern day DSLRs.

The production was King Lear, now i have never read or seen a production of King Lear but from what i saw i really like it. I love shakespeare (when i can understand it), i love the relationship between the characters, the misunderstandings, the supernatural aspects etc... the list goes on, but it takes me at least 3 reads of the same play to get a good grasp of the story and relationships. The lovely rachel grabbed me from reception and got me in to the performance studio and everything was going fine until i snapped two frames and this really frustrating director motions me over and whispers into my ears (yet still in a commanding tone)

"Your shutter is too loud, Make sure if you are going to take a picture, you know exactly what picture you want to take before you press that button, don't just click randomly!!!"

Now i'm a very easy going person and i like most other normal people out there show respect to other professionals when i am working with them, to me that was a HUGE insult because A) i'm going there to help out, B) I've invested money in to USM lenses as they are virtually silent, there is very little i can do about the camera shutter sound since its a REHEARSAL!!!! not a live performance, so i can't justify spending a tone of money on a camera body noise dampener, and C) I didn't walk over to the actors and tell them what lines to cut, where to stand or who to look at as they are saying specific lines so WHAT gives him the right to tell me "don't just click randomly".... like i just press the button for 2 hours and hope for the best!!! IMBECILE!!!!

Ahh..... sorry about the ranting on, i just needed to vent, Rachel and the other creatives did a fantastic job with the production and i wish i hadn't seen the production through a viewfinder and got the chance to sit among the audience and really enjoy it, but no doubt one day i will hunt down a production of King Lear and hopefully be FRONT ROW for the experience.

Thank you for reading.